The Other Side

It all seems a bit surreal now but the transplant went ahead and, touch wood, we're both doing fine.

The build up to the big day seemed to be a mixture of trepidation and occasional tears along with some very close and tender moments. Before we new it the time to go to the hospital was upon us. They wanted us in a day before for some final checks and tests so we arrived early that day and were allocated our various appointment times for tests and seeing consultants. By the end of it all I have to admit I was all question and answered out and had been given the obligatory name band and had been allocated a bed. They let us out for a few hours in the evening to have a nice meal somewhere and a glass of wine. Quite a surprise that but it helped to take the edge off things. When we got back neither of us could sleep so we stayed up chatting in the relatives room till the early hours before we could fight off the need to sleep no more. In my bed I wrote two draft emails before nodding off, one for my wife and the other for my son, just in case.

Morning came too quickly, and I was given a gown and some support stockings, (green to match my eyes) to put on after my shower. When it was time one of the renal nurses walked with me to the anaesthetic room. My wife came part of the way as it was quite a walk. Her operation would be later in the day when the kidney she was having had arrived. When we parted there were tears, kisses and laughter as she commented that in my gown and slippers with a pink blanket over my shoulders and hair tied back I resembled Widow Twanky. In the anaesthetic room we waited for the other sites to confirm their donors were also ready and willing to go ahead. It was all quite familiar and chatty as it was explained what was about to happen. Then came the final OK and I went under.

Next thing I recall is coming to in Recovery with nurses reminding me to breathe. I was knackered and just wanted to sleep, (lack of sleep for two nights might have something to do with that). I was in Recovery for a little longer than expected as my blood pressure rose too high and they had to medicate to bring it down. My wife was soon in Recovery too and we waved to each other and said we loved each other. She went ahead of me to the ward but eventually I followed though I don't recall the journey back.

On the ward the pain was well managed. It seems morphine doesn't agree with me but was counteracted with anti sickness drugs. I was reminded to cough which as you can imagine would send a wave of pain across the main scar, Ouch! But it wasn't too bad and I needed to make sure my chest stayed clear so I didn't develop a chest infection. The first day we spent in bed. It seems a bit of a blur between sleep and being woken for various tests every so often. The second day I heard my wife was sitting in a chair and had set the bar for me to follow. So I promptly did so. The pain itself was manageable. It occasionally felt like someone had kicked me in the stomach but it wasn't too bad. In the afternoon it was a toss up as to whether my wife or I would attempt to walk across the ward to see the other. I had fewer lines coming out of me so it was down to me. There are times when a zimmer frame has its uses and this was one, though my wife has commented it was sometimes a sight to see with me pottering about with my drain in one hand, zimmering along with my bum sticking out of my gown for all to see.

Within four days I was home. The pain killers were having some horrible effects on my dreams and I was looking forward to stopping them as soon as I could. My wife came home the following day. It's amazing how quickly they turn things around these days as they say it helps the recovery and there is less risk of infection. My mother was staying with us the first week or so and we had friends visiting us so we were not having to cope alone.

Almost immediately we were back the next day for my wife's regular clinic visits. Three times a week to start, getting in early so blood tests can be taken and checked. It's all looking good at the moment and her clinics have been reduced to two. As for me I had my own clinic at two weeks and have been told I'm looking well, they don't want to see me now for six months. Now we are looking at getting back to normal, well as much as possible. The novelty value of talking about it to people we haven't seen since before is getting a bit thin. I've been back in work for a week after a fair few weeks away. Getting tired occasionally, my body only slightly reminding me what it has been through. All that is left are three keyhole scars and a longer one on my tummy. My wife says it resembles a Cesarean scar and now I have something in common with some real women out here. Obviously I've cottoned on to that and tend to use that description of what it looks like to people who ask. Fingers crossed things will continue to go well for my wife. I was told on the day my kidney had taken well with the recipient. I don't see it as my kidney, but theirs. I will never know who they are but I wish them well across the ether.